Lately, I've been wondering if I'm a fickle person. I feel very confused. Remember Jeff? Well, I'm not sure if I'm in love with him anymore. Actually, I'm not sure I ever was. Maybe these past couple of months of not talking to him have made the feelings I had for him lessen, or maybe I was just infatuated. I don't know. All I know is that if I were truly in love, the feelings would have stayed, or even gotten stronger. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, right? Not in my case. Don't get me wrong, his silence is still very worrisome. I have yet to hear from him, but I'm not feeling about him like I once did. Does that make me fickle? Before you answer that, read this next part.
I recently met a guy, Dylan, this past week. In that amount of time, we have talked on the phone for about a total of 10 hours, give or take. And if we're not on the phone, we talk online. We even stay up until all hours of the morning talking, sometimes about something, sometimes about nothing. And here's the thing: I like him, I really do. But I'm scared to admit how much I like him for a number of reasons, one of them being my wondering if I am unstable and unpredictable in my feelings for men. And this is not the first time something like this has happened. It has happened on at least one other occasion.
So, am I a fickle person when it comes to men and my feelings for them, and if I am, why am I like this?
9 comments:
No, I don't think you're fickle. I think it is easier to fall in and out of love with men you've met online and haven't interacted with in real life. Communication is 90% nonverbal. You don't build a relationship by passing notes to one another. It's much easier to type good things than actually DO good things - that's how true character is shown.
My opinion is that online relationships give you an illusion of knowing someone... You don't really. Or, you do, but not on a meaningful enough level.
G'luck anyway!
Nicky, thanks. Online relationships are tough, mainly because of what you said. Real life interaction is a huge part of a relationship, and while one can be deceived in real life, it's easier to do so online.
Good luck, happy you met someone you liked. I hope you only have good and not grief. I don't think you are fickle btw.
since when does absence make the heart grow fonder??
It makes y frustrated, but after a week or so you forget about it and move on.
Relationships are a scary thing, bc the truth is any good guy and good girl with some similar life paths can get along well. So there are many guys/girls that you can get along with.
Its silly to beat yourself up over that.
Im not really in the whole bf/gf long term world, but i do know that you can go out for months or years and break up. Then a month later be steady with someone else. How is that possible? It must be there are more then one compatible person for you.
Online is even crazier, and people need to meet before deciding if they are in love or not.
Im mean love sheeshers. OMG. you were not in love with him. Love means sacrifice for another, You love people that you give yourself too.
since when does absence make the heart grow fonder??
It makes y frustrated, but after a week or so you forget about it and move on.
Relationships are a scary thing, bc the truth is any good guy and good girl with some similar life paths can get along well. So there are many guys/girls that you can get along with.
Its silly to beat yourself up over that.
Im not really in the whole bf/gf long term world, but i do know that you can go out for months or years and break up. Then a month later be steady with someone else. How is that possible? It must be there are more then one compatible person for you.
Online is even crazier, and people need to meet before deciding if they are in love or not.
Im mean love sheeshers. OMG. you were not in love with him. Love means sacrifice for another, You love people that you give yourself too.
Cellar Door, sometimes when you're away from a person, you miss them more and think about them...when you are constantly communicating with them, then they're always there, always on your mind with the here and now...if you don't talk to them for a while, you can dwell on things that have been said and think about what's going on.
i'm getting into this one a little late of course. but i think if you were really in love, you would miss them, absense *does* make the heart grow fonder when there is love (at least that's been my experience, but of course i'm the one who waited 12 months for Mr Stupidity Himself to come back).
anyway i agree with the others, you cant really say you're in love with someone until you've met them. there are several levels a relationship is built on, and you cant really have any one of them by itself and have a strong relationship. words are one of the most important perhaps, but you need other connections too, nonverbal communication, watching behavior, etc.
and speaking of need -- you need to get on LIVEJOURNAL and start reading MY blog :P
thank god im not the only one who feels this way, thanku for this post =]
I typed "why am i fickle" in to google and this blog came up. :)
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